About Dominique

http://dominiquegoh.com

Singaporean Educator, Coach and Hands on Mom of Three. Connect with me on Google+

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Weekend Reflections: Reflecting on Parenting

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My new shoes

My new shoes

Parenting is never easy. It gets all so more complicated when you have more then one child and all of them have vast differences in their personality. Are they introvert or extrovert? What methods work best with each child? It is a constant trial and error situation as the kids personalities and preferences are evolving as they grow.  There is no set answer to problems which we may face and it certainly has been extremely stressful at times trying to find a solution to the obstacles that come my way.

I have been reading quite a few parenting books the past month and the two books- Raising Boys by design 

and Quiet Kids gave me quite a lot of insight into how to guide my kids.

HERO

Honor– adhering to truth, values, compassion, and principles beyond self

Enterprise- working at important things, whether they seem big or small

Responsibility– carrying important people and things throughout life.

Originality– being a dreamer, a thinker and an explorer in this world

HERO is what we should be focusing on for our kids. (especially boys)

To be able to understand our kids we should first ask ourselves these questions.

 

1. What are my kids original thoughts and doings?

 

2. Where does he/she shine and what are his/her gifts?

 

3.  Am I stretching him creatively and imaginatively?

 

4. What steps could I take to strengthen his/her imagination and his/her critical thinking skills?

 

6. Am I letting him/her develop naturally or pushing him/her to do what I want him/her  to do instead?

7. Which areas are your kids doing well while which areas are they failing behind in?

8. How are the challenges in their lives stimulating growth in each area?

9. How are we teaching our kids to be HEROS?

 

Teaching boys are different from teaching girls.  Boys need to be constantly challenged to practice original thinking and creative action in honorable,  enterprising and responsible ways. They have to be taught to be HEROES.

They will fail  and falter many times. They will think something is original only to find out that it has been done before. And they will get hurt, emotionally and even physically, as they take risk towards originality. But without those risks and without testing grounds for their gifts, their GOD given heroic design will remain unfulfilled.

How are you teaching your boys to be HEROS?

 

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Raising Boys by Design

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Raising Boys Design Book Cover

Raising Boys Design Book Cover

Raising Boys by Design: What the Bible and Brain Science Reveal About What Your Son Needs to Thrive by Gregory L Jantz , PhD and Michael Gurian is a book which combines faith with bring up of boys.

The book is divided into two sections

–  What a boy learns from his parents

– How to build character and self discipline in your son.

What he learns from his mom and dad are different as both of them are wired to focus on different emotions and needs in life.

Moms are seen as the more cautious persons while the dads are risk takers and are more detached in their parenting.

There are many things which boys have to be taught. Among them are the following.

1) New skills

2) Learning how to meet challenges with enterprising energy and acumen

3) self motivation and self-direction in the pursuit of invention and innovation

4) how to follow leaders and become a leader

5) understand what his talent set is and how to optimize it.

Parents and mentors make a huge impact in a boy’s development and we need all the help that we can to turn them into HEROES.

 

My thoughts

Having two boys I was really interested to learn how to  biblical teachings can be incorporated in the raising of boys. I have always seen the bible as a separate entity to a parenting guide and it’s interesting to know that there are relevant life lessons that are explained in that book.

I wanted to know how to develop their potentials to the fullest and this book certainly didn’t fall short of my expectations. The authors gave a clear explanation how as parents (especially fathers) are able to help guide their sons through the different stages of their childhood.

It is important that parents take an active role in their son’s education  and guide them to become HEROIC men.

 

Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book for review purposes. All opinions are 100% mine.This post has a compensation level of 3. Please visit Dominique’s Disclosure page for more information.

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