Making Sense of the Jigsaw Puzzle

Dominique Book Review, Parenting and Kids Autism, parenting book

Making Sense of the Jigsaw Puzzle

Making Sense of the Jigsaw Puzzle: A Parent’s Account of a Child with Autism by Theuns and Tania Henning is based on the Henning’s experience with their autistic son Reuben.

Reuben was their long awaited son who arrived after years of fertility treatments which they had underwent. Initially it was perceived that they may have a child who was inflicted with down syndrome as previously suspected. It came as a total shock when the doctor announced that Ruben has severe autism. It was a lifelong disease which had no cure and there was very little which could be done to alleviate his condition.

Theuns and Tania would have to learn by trial and error what worked and what didn’t with Reuben. It wasn’t an easy journey for them and they are still learning now what has to be done for their son to be able to live a “normal” life.

They were fortunate to have help from their community and have friends and relatives reach out to them in their time of need. The physical and financial help that was rendered to them was invaluable and helped them tie over all the difficult periods that they went through.

My Thoughts

It was a refreshing read to hear from a parent’s perspective how dealing with Autism has been like. I have Autistic kids before and it is very challenging trying to get their attention and understand how they tick.

It’s remarkable that the authors were able to overcome their own mental and physical barriers to be able to reach out and provide for their son. The amount of patience and love that they have is really amazing.

I would have given up long ago if it had taken 18 months of diligently bringing my child to the potty every 5 minutes to toilet train him like what they did for Ruben.

It takes a lot of discipline on the part of the parent and being consistent for an Autistic child to be able to learn. Most of the time there is no clear indication that the child is able to understand the given instructions and only in moments of clarity will things suddenly click and the lesson taught product results.

Theuns and Tania Henning are really an amazing couple.

Do pick up a copy of the book Making Sense of the Jigsaw Puzzle: A Parent’s Account of a Child with Autism to experience the Henning’s story.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book for review purposes. All opinions are 100% mine. This post has affiliate links.

April 23, 2015

Parenting with Presence

Dominique Book Review, Parenting and Kids, Parenting Views parenting book

Parenting with Presence Book Cover

Parenting with Presence: Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids (An Eckhart Tolle Edition) by Susan Stiffelman is one book which I recommend parents to read.

It isn’t easy being a parent however with these tips from Susan it will make your journey as a parent much smoother.

In the 11 chapters of the book Susan brings the readers through how it is growing up while raising kids, communicating with them, cultivating them and helping them coping with stress.

She shows how Happiness is an Inside Job and shares with the readers Tools, Tips and Strategies on coping.

The way that we interact with our kids maybe a reflection of suppressed emotions that we have due to our own childhood experiences. Sometimes these get manifested when our kids unknowingly hit our trigger buttons.

If one able to identify why certain behaviors emerge in you as a child you would be able to address that first before tackling and correcting your child’s behavior.

Through listening and being fully present in the presence of your child you will be able to gain his cooperation. Accepting him as he is will prove that you genuinely care about him and gain his alliance.

This will prevent the relationship that you have with your child from disintegrating and help build on the existing bond that you have.

“When we cannot shield our children from painful
experiences, the next best thing is to be fully present to them,
helping them through the process by letting them feel their
sadness and disappointment.”

I find this paragraph very insightful. As a parent we wish to shelter our children from unpleasant experiences. However if we do this all the time they will not be given the opportunity to grow and learn to cope with these not so nice situations on their own.

There are questions at the end of each chapter which the reader can go through and do some self reflection on how he/she has been doing as a parent in that particular area of focus.

With the question and answer section one gets an insight and suggestions on how to deal with problems in given scenarios.

Susan believes that through our engagement with the kids they get to learn and pick up the values which we wish to instill in them. By giving them an idea on how they can and should behave they will grow up to be better people.

My thoughts

I found this book to be a very insightful read. I especially love the paragraph below.

Our kids deserve to know that even if we can’t always meet their needs or offer them the validation they long for, they are still wholly lovable and uniquely brilliant just as they are.

What we do as a parent directly affects their ability to grow into adults themselves. There are many things that we as parents are able to do to guide our children through their childhood.

I agree with a lot that Susan had shared in her book. Being a parent we have to be vigilant at all times about our demeanor. Our kids emulate how we behave and are always watching us to see how we perform in different situations.

We need to demonstrate to them what are good manners through our daily living and also be good models for them. Through our own behaviour they learn how to cope with the stressors of life and deal with the different obstacles which they may face as they are growing up.

Do grab a copy of the book Parenting with Presence: Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids (An Eckhart Tolle Edition) by Susan Stiffelman if you are interested to know more tips from her.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book for review purposes. All opinions are 100% mine. This post has affiliate links.