During the past week R and I have been deciding on how to spend better quality time together as a family. Since the both of us are working we only have limited time with the boys at night.
While planning out the activities which we would like to do together with the boys as a family and with each one individually. After much deliberation we came up with the timetable shown above. We decided to list down the activities that we wish to conduct each night.
The requirements which I had for the planned activities were
One activity to be done as a family
One activity to be done either as a mother/son or father/son pair. If I was busy coaching Ryan in his piano practice R would be occupying Roy with Japanese flashcards /storybook reading or PC time.
What activities do you schedule to do with your kids during weeknights?
This past month I have been focusing a lot on family renewal and building up a better relationship with both my spouse and kids.
Early July I was privillaged to receive a copy of Your Family Constitution by Scot Gale. I was introduced to this book by Vered of Momgrind.
Scott’s book was an eye opener for me as it taugh me how to create a Family Constitution which is unique and best suited for the needs of my family.
In this modern world that we live in we are very easily sidetracked by the attraction of material wants and personal satisfaction to spend enough attention and focus on the family.
Our personal values may not be in the best interest of or family and could be the source of conflict in our relationships with one another.
Scott talked about his Black Sunday whereby everything when haywire for him after getting into a huge arguement with his wife. While walking all the way back home from the beach it gave him the time needed to think about where his family was heading and how best to remedy this breakdown in communication.
Even though the boys are still relatively young I feel that it is about time that I start teaching them about our family values and teaching them about rules and consequences for their actions. I’m sure that fellow parents of young kids know the frustrations in getting them to understand the need of following instructions and letting them develop at their own pace.
Kids learn best when they are given guidelines and boundaries. With a set of rules and guidelines coupled with rewards and treats we can slowly shape them into well mannered individuals who at the same time are matured enough to make and stand by their own judgements.
I started a reward chart with Ryan earlier on this year which he has completed. I think that it is now time to work on a new reward/motivational chart for him and do up one for Ryan also. Besides the kids we as parents too should have a reward chart which could be prominently displayed so that the kids could see how that we too are working hard for our own rewards and model the behaviours that we hope to see cultivated in them.
Reading Your Family Constitution has given me a better understanding on what I would like to incalculate in the upbringing of my kids. It has sparked off lots of ideas on how I can revise our family motto and vision and incorporate the kids suggestions into making our own family constitution.
Scott Gale has very generously agreed to let me give away a copy of his book to one of the lucky readers here at Dominique’s Desk.
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