December 27, 2009

What it means to be a Mummy

Dominique Thoughts

Roy doing the Victory Sign together with me

Since the 5th of March 2004 I entered motherhood with the birth of Ryan. Fast forward to today, almost 6 years later, it is one of the best experiences that I have had so far.  Before the birth of my children I have always planned to be a hands on mother. I wanted to be a mother that would always be there for her children.

I didn’t want to have any regrets about missing seeing my children reach their various milestones in life because I was too busy pursuing an exciting career or enjoying myself to spend quality and quantity time with them.  A jet setting career with long working hours is not something which I fancy and I’m lucky that my current profession doesn’t involve travelling and I am able to spend time at home nurturing and providing for the needs of my boys.

I have seen and witnessed how families have fallen apart and kids grow distant from their parents as they do not spend time with them. It is a sad reality for many families with both parents working and having to rely heavily on foreign helpers to bring up their kids. These kids are extremely attention seeking and some to the point of being disruptive in school due to their lack of parental attention at home. They grow up to be materialistic , arrogant and angry individuals as they are constantly “bribed” by the parents who are focused more on their academic results then their holistic development. This was not what I would want with my own kids.

Money can’t buy everything and fix every problem that you may be facing.

I chose to spend the crucial first 2 years at home with my boys so that I could personally cultivate and stimulate their minds. Learning first hand from mummy is much different from an a nanny or granny who are more concerned with their physical well being then their mental development.

I had noticed a stark different between kids just left to their grandparents /maids and those that were actively nurtured by their parents. The kids with the grandparents seem less stimulated and developed speech and motor skills slower as compared to their counterparts.

Outsourcing the care of the boys is not an option for me as I want to be able to fully maximize their learning potential and groom them to be independent and well-balanced individuals. I also do not want the boys to suffer from any development delay due to neglect and ignorance on the part of the caregiver.

Even so with the extremely hectic schedule dealing with the challenges of work, family and house I wouldn’t want it any different. Being involved in every aspect of their life brings me great joy and satisfaction.

It has been a journey or many trials and errors and will continue to be a learning journey for me.

Motherhood is never easy as I face many different challenges daily. However through all the struggles and pains that I go through with my children ,I get the opportunity to build up a long lasting bond with them which will last them throughout their livelihood. This is something which I will always cherish.

What does Motherhood mean to you?