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April 29, 2009 | Dominique | Comments 3

Is the Door Wide Open? Communicating with your Child

opendoor

Photo from Flickr

A little gesture, a warm smile or a tight hug? What do you do to strike a conversation with your kids?

Do your kids see you are welcoming or do they shudder and give you the about turn saying- “No Mummy.. Go Away!!”

Communicating with your child is the first step to get to know him better.

In this busy world of us we get so caught up with the multiple gadgets around us that we tend to ignore the little things which are all so much more important to us.

Make Time

Try to make it a habit to spend some time daily to talk to your child. If it is not possible to be physically present you could send him an e-mail or a text message to let him know that you are interested to know how his day was and willing to share how your day was with him.

Listen Attentively

Every child deserves your full attention.  When my boys come to me I will turn and focus on them as they share their highlights of the day.

For my own students in class I will try to give individual attention to them if they do require after I have completed teaching the tasks on hand.

If I am not able to attend to them immediately I will let them know that now is not a convenient time to talk and that they should come back in 5 or 10 minutes time whereby I can give them my full attention without interrupting them when they speak.

Have an Open Mind

Do not be quick to criticize , judge your child or compare your child to others  when they speak to you.

Fault finding  is the greatest turn off.  I personally scoff at having to endure complains and being constantly compared against others.

To put down your child  without guiding him on how to improve on his situation/behaviour is really a No-No.

It will really turn them off and they

The constant comparison   about how good/clever so and so child is compared to your child does little to motivate him/her. Instead they may turn the other way and just give up trying.

Know your Child

Every child is unique.  To really know your child is to be able to focus on his strengths and corresponding weaknesses.  To be able to give encouragement and help when they need. To know when to assist and when to withdraw help so they will be able to grow both spiritually and mentally.

If your child knows that  you acknowledge his individuality and am willing to link up to him so that both of you are able to understand each other well I’m sure that it will prevent them from keeping secrets from you in future.

Is your door open wide or kept shut?

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  1. *hi-five*
    I’m with you on this one, definitely!
    I’ve been doing all and they are showing the results I want. A closer bond, and “there’s nothing I can’t tell Mommy about” kind of relationship… Love it!

  2. @Angeline,
    It’s great that you managed to forge such a close bond with your boys. It is also the kind of relationship that I want to maintain with my boys.

  3. Hello ,
    Thanks for this wonderful advice , we would definatley keep that in mind.
    Regards
    Sudeep

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