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Finding a New Me- Emotional Wellness

Tiger girl and me- Dominique's Desk
Tiger girl and me

Taking care of your emotions is extremely important. You mental well-being affects everything else around you.

Emotional Wellness implies the ability to be aware of and accept our feelings, rather than deny them, have an optimistic approach to life, and enjoy life despite its occasional disappointments and frustrations.

One goes through an array of different types of feelings for dawn to dusk. The emotions that we experience  can be positive or negative and it is especially essential that we acknowledge each and every emotion that we feel.

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash
Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

How we cope with the negativity, emotional stress, disappointments and frustrations will shape the way we live.   You are the one who truly decides how you live.

To go for it alone or remain a People Pleaser and disregard your own emotions? I’m done being a  People Pleaser and ignoring my own well being for the sake of others who do not appreciate any of your sacrifice. I’m saying “No!” more often then before and focusing on what truly  matters to me and having my peace of mind.  No more surpressing my own emotions and giving up on my desires because of others.

I will not let others influence my emotions and send myself spiraling into depression because of their selfishness. It is not easy to remain level headed and not get influenced by their warped mentality.  I had enough of suppressing my own feelings so that others would feel good.

I have made many difficult decisions these two years and have shifted the focus to be more on ME. I will be turning 40 next year and it is about time that I shift the focus back on myself after devoting myself selflessly to the family and the kids for the past 20 years.

LOVE YOURSELF

Nobody can care more about you then yourself.  Being the pillar of the family it is extremely important that I keep sane and also be in the best of health physically and mentally. I  have been working more on increasing my mental awareness through reading self help books and articles that I find online.  This has made me more acutely  in tune to my own feelings.

1 Peter 5:7-Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

I have learned to trust my GUT more and also leave all my worries to GOD.  Do the best that I can and let him handle the rest. Having such a perception greatly reduced the amount of stress that I feel.  Being able to handle my own emotions has certainly made me  a better person. I am more patient and less rash in my actions.   When things get a bit overwhelming I give myself chance to pause before deciding on what action to take in that particular situation.

Once emotions are triggered it may cause an array of feelings to surface within you.  Sometimes these feelings may be very hard to control and it really takes a lot of discipline to calm those frayed nerves in order to think and act rationally.  The intensity can be overwhelming  at times and makes one act out of the norm.

Our Fight or Flight mentality may lead us to act irrational at times therefore it is essential to remain grounded at all times.

Looking through the globe
Looking through the globe

Sometimes our thoughts may  seem to magnify the situation and give it too much emphasis then it actually  needs.  In moments like this I try to take a step back and refocus to align our thoughts so that my emotions are more settled before making any major decisions.

I do know that these challenges that are sent our way is GOD’s way of shaping us into a better person.  These trials that we have to endure will prepare us for entering his kingdom in his time.  It sometimes feels frustrating especially when things don’t seem to be going this way and it can be utterly exhausting at time.

Our emotional well being affects our health and attitude towards life therefore I find it extremely important to keep our emotions in check always.

It is essential that I keep myself emotionally healthy so that I will be able to lead and guide the kids well therefore I do take many moments of ME TIME a week to recharge and reflect on the actions that I have taken that particular week.

During these pockets of time I would reflect on the actions that I had done and  how I felt in relation to  the problems/ situations that I am currently handling.

As a single parent my kids only have me to look as up as mentor and guide therefore it is critical that I am emotionally balanced to be able to handle the changing emotions of the kids and guiding them properly on how to handle their own emotions.

How do you take care of your own emotional wellness?

  1. Finding a New Me – An Intro
  2. Finding a New Me- Results after 16 weeks
  3. Finding a New Me – Mental Wellness
  4. finding a New Me- Emotional Wellness

 

 

Finding a New ME- Mental Wellness

Since this series started  Nov last year I have yet to start writing a post on it even after the initial teaser post and 16th week check in post 

The past few months had been extremely busy for me and I  haven’t had the time to pen all my thoughts down.  Now that my schedule has more or less settled I can spend more time here on the blog and continue the series which I have put on hold.

Photo of Me
Photo of Me

Since last year I have been tweaking  my exercise and diet routine and experimenting on several different things to increase my energy levels.   Taking care of ones personal   mental  wellness is essential and I’m determined to take very good care of myself.

MENTAL Wellness

 is defined as “a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community.”

 

It is extremely important  to take care of one’s mental health in order to do well in life. You need a balance to be able to function at an optimal level.

There are many aspects in  mental wellness that one has to take note of.  The  factors that make up wellness are defined in the poster above.

  1. Emotional wellness
    the ability to understand ourselves and cope with the challenges life can bring through acknowledging and share feelings of anger, fear, sadness or stress; hope, love, joy and happiness in a productive manner.
  2. Physical Wellness
    the ability to maintain a healthy quality of life that allows us to get through our daily activities without undue fatigue or physical stress. The ability to recognize that our behaviors have a significant impact on our wellness and adopting healthful habits (routine check ups, a balanced diet, exercise, etc.) while avoiding destructive habits (tobacco, drugs, alcohol, etc.)
  3. Financial Wellness
    the ability to be financially sufficient  with an understanding of spending habits, To be able to budget and plan for financial freedom.
  4. Social wellness
    the ability to relate to and connect with other people in our world through establishing and maintaining positive relationships with family, friends and co-workers.
  5. Mental wellness
    the ability to establish peace and harmony in our lives. The ability to develop congruence between values and actions and to realize a common purpose that binds creation together
  6. Environmental wellness
    the ability to recognize our own responsibility for the quality of the air, the water and the land that surrounds us and how we can make a positive impact on the quality of our environment.
  7. Intellectual wellness
    the ability to open our minds to new ideas and experiences that can be applied to personal decisions, group interaction and community betterment through the  desire to learn new concepts, improve skills and seek challenges in pursuit of lifelong learning .
  8. Spiritual wellness
    the ability to understand GOD and his WORD. To have a purpose of live based on the values and teaching of GOD.

All these eight dimensions have  to be well integrated for one to have a balanced life. It is no mean feat for one to achieve and it does need a lot of effort for one not to neglect one dimension in favor of another.

Is it possible to simultaneous develop all these different dimensions at the same time?

This is a question which I have pondered over for quite a while.  I deliberated on how to achieve it given my current situation and understanding.  There isn’t a model answer to this question but what I do know that it is certainly doable if one takes calculated steps to attain the desired goal.

In the next few posts I will be going through all the above mentioned points in detail starting with Emotional Wellness.

What have you been doing to develop yourself?

  1. Finding a New Me – An Intro
  2. Finding a New Me- Results after 16 weeks
  3. Finding a New Me – Mental Wellness
  4. Finding a New Me- Emotional Wellness