Teaching Kids to Think: Raising Confident, Independent, and Thoughtful Children in an Age of Instant Gratification by Darlene Stweetland and Ron Stolberg is a book addressed to the parents of today.
In this Digital age of us a lot of our kids demand instant response and do not have the ability or understanding of the meaning of delayed gratitude or being patient.
Through the 13 chapters of the book. The authors bring readers through the following areas.
– The Parent Trap ( Solving the problem for the kid)
– Missed Opportunities when Parents rescue their children
– Handling Mistakes
– The role of parents vs technology
– The dangers of the modern world – Drugs and Alcohol.
Darlene and Ron start of the book by posing this question to the readers.
What type of parent are you?
The one who works harder then the child to solve his/her problem or the one that lets him/her solve her own problem? What say you on this? Are you one that has fallen into the parenting trap?
They define the parenting traps as the following
1) The Rescue trap – Rescue the children from their problems
2) The Hurried Trap- Dishing out instant gratification by meeting the child’s need without hesitation
3) The Pressure Trap- Pushing children forward too fast
4) The Giving trap- Giving the child something without them earning it
5) The Guilty Trap- Parents react impulsively because they feel guilty or unsure.
Parents need to be aware that it is more important to give the kids the tools that they need to solve their problems. They need to teach their kids how to handle their emotions and take responsibilities for the decisions that they make.
Learning self-discipline and delayed gratification as a child will certainly assist a kid in achieving his academic goals and developing positive interpersonal skills.
Being able to make informed decisions based on available information and being confident in the decision that is made is something which each child has to develop. Adults have to be consistent with their actions so that they match their words.
This makes it easier for the child to emulate what the adult has done and pick up problem solving and social skills which are necessary to function well in society.
I found this book an excellent read and agree with many of the suggestions and pointers that have been raised by the authors.
Many a times it is through their own personal life experience as a kid that the parent wishes that things will be different with their offspring.
Seeing their child in a similar situation to how they were at that age makes them want to prevent them from any negative experiences which are associated with it. By preventing these experiencing from occurring the parent robs the child of their opportunity to develop the skills which they need to deal with negative emotions or challenges.
I believe that a child must be able to experience both the good and the bad to be able to develop their independence and maturity.
They need to be given the chance to be responsible for the own actions and to accept the consequences of their decisions.
Helping your child to develop his core values and belief is very important and this is what I am constantly working on with my child.
Focusing on holistic development of the child is certainly very important.
As a parent I want my child to have both IQ and EQ so that he is able to be self sufficient and adaptable when he reaches adulthood. This can only be possible if he develops the tools that are necessary to cope with challenges during his childhood. With the correct tool set and abilities he will be able to survive in this harsh world of ours.
( For Readers based in USA /Canada Only )
A copy of the book Teaching Kids to Think
This giveaway runs from 6th March to 20th of March (2359hrs Singapore Time)
Winners will be randomly selected via Rafflecopter on the 21st March 2015.
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Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book for review purposes. All opinions are 100% mine. This post has affiliate links.