Writer’s Workshop: Not so Ordinary Birthday

Tiger girl and me
Tiger girl and me with my birthday chocolate Mooncake.

Last Friday I celebrated my 36th birthday.  I’ve now  officially in the other side of the mid thirties.  Celebrations this year was much more fun then last year.  This year I got to celebrate with the kids and they didn’t even need to skip school as it was a school holiday. (PSLE ORAL examination day) That’s really cool that all the other levels have the day off because of the national examinations for the P6 pupils.

The kids and me
The kids and me

R took the day off so that we could go out together as a family. Our first stop was at the recently opened Alive Museum at Suntec City. It was the first time that the boys went to such a museum.

R and I had visited a similar museum during our trip to Jeju island, Korea last year with Tiger girl.  What’s so special about this museum you may ask?  Let me show you how fun it is.

R taking on the Chinese warrior in a battle
R taking on the Chinese warrior in a battle

At this museum you can post for pictures like the one that I took of R. You can do ” incredible” stunts effortlessly and enjoy fooling around while having your picture taken.

Doing the split at the circus
Doing the split at the circus

Even difficult poses like this split is certainly not impossible to achieve.  One can even pose with grace while executing it.

Posing with the cat
Posing with the cat

It is okay if you are not a fan of furry animals like I am. You still will be able to pose for pictures with them like I did in the photo above.  There isn’t a need to worry about being allergic to cat fur or being animal phobic.

The kids in a paper boat
The kids in a paper boat

If your kids are like mine and get too much to handle at times you can load them into a paper boat and let it sail off out to sea.  That’s really cool right??

Monkey boy posing in the guillotine
Monkey boy posing in the guillotine

In this museum you can literally  give your kid a death sentence if they drive you up the wall. It’s totally legal in this scenario!! Your kid would  even get to write down his last wish before the execution occurs.

Monkey boy's last wish
Monkey boy’s last wish

Can you guess what was his last wish?

 

The chocolate mooncake after it had been cut.
The chocolate mooncake after it had been cut.

After a fun time at the Alive museum we met up with my mum and sister and had a birthday meal together. This year I didn’t want to have a mini cake or a slice of cake to celebrate. I decided on a mooncake instead as we would be celebrating the mooncake festival in the coming weeks and many places have already started to sell mooncakes.

Mooncakes being an extremely high calories dessert was something that I try my best to abstain from. However that day I felt that I should give myself a treat and everyone wouldn’t have any excuse not to share in finishing the mooncake.  I cut it into 8 pieces so everyone had a small slice each and I managed to fulfill my craving for it

(If you were wondering it was a baked chocolate lotus paste mooncake with dulcey crunchy pearls and mango pineapple fillings  that cost  SGD$10.40)

Our family of 5
Our family of 5

They day would have been perfect if we were able to go on the LUGE at Sentosa  if not for the heavy mid day storm. Our plans for the 2nd stop of the day was shelved and we went shopping instead.

Alive Museum

Opening hours : 10am-10pm daily

Suntec City Mall #03-372 (between Towers 3 & 4) 

 

Jenny Matlock Mama’s Losin’ It

SANses.com's Talkative Thursdays

 

Disclaimer: We were given complimentary tickets for the ALIVE Museum. All opinions are 100% my own.

You and Me – Love (Part One)

R and Me
R and Me

Love- A deep affection for another person

Love is something that we feel when we are in a relationship. It can be in   different forms depending on who our object of affection is .  Love between a parent and a child,  between siblings and spouses differ. 

Our love can be our source of joy and pride. It can also be at the same time  what that causes us anguish and pain. You can say that it can be a double edge sword at times which can really cut you till you feel the grinding of your bones from within.

In the previous post – Where Do we Begin I mentioned  how my concepts about relationships were formed during my childhood years and how it has affected me in my current relationships. In this post I will be touching on how I feel towards love.

It all starts with a spark.  A connection which is felt between on individual and another.  The catalyst which starts off a chemical reaction that may lead to unforeseen results. (Good or bad)

Everyone’s experience in Love differ  together with their perception.  I don’t profess to be a love guru and do not have the answers  to all the questions that you may have regarding this subject.

What I have though is my personal experience in handling the different types of love- romantic, friendship and kinship which I will be sharing with you.

 Man are from Mars ,Women are from Venus

I’m sure you may have heard of these sentences before if you have read the books by John Gray.  It’s amazing how two opposites attract and click with each other.  It takes a lot of understanding and tolerance to be able to accommodate another person into you life.  The changes made are permanent and may be irrevocable irregardless if the person remains in your life or not.

Scenery captured by R during his recent NZ trip
Scenery captured by R during his recent NZ trip

 If there is no love there will be no reason for a person to want to be together with another. There is no yearning to stand by the other person through thick and thin and brave all the battles and obstacles together.  This is certainly the case for romantic relationships.

R and I have been together for  18 yrs and married for 13.  You can say that I have known him half my life and we have been through many  different obstacles together.  It is an on-going learning process as we both strive to keep an equilibrium.

Being open and able to compromise plays an important part in building a relationship.  Many problems start because of assumptions on the part of one person that the other person understands his/her train of thought.

What I have learned so far that is is absolutely important to be very explicit when dealing with the opposite sex. They need everything to be written down word for word to be able to fully comprehend what you want to convey to them. They do not know how to mind read and really need to be shown step by step what is required to be done.

R and I have had our fair share of communication breakdown and still do have constant disagreements on certain issues. Many a times tempers fly because one party feels that they have been slighted or been unfairly judged.

Sometimes I get so flustered and worked up that it stresses me up big time. You can be so angry that you find it extremely difficult to communicate with the other person.  It is hard to talk and act calmly or behave rationally.

It is during moments like that I rely heavily on non-verbal methods of communication like using Whatsapp and e-mail to communicate with him.  It is too painful to talk face to face as I’m sure that whatever I wish to say may come out wrong in the end. Putting things down in writing helps to defuse the negative feelings that that I am feeling and helps me calm down.

I don’t believe in playing the part of the demure and subservient wife and being LORD over. I do need to live my own life and not a life that is dictated by others.

Even though I do know that it is important to take the other person’s feelings and needs into consideration. It is really a very delicate matter which requires a lot of pondering about to find the best solution for the issue on hand.

Not all conflicts that we have had were amicably solved.  I admit that I can be extremely stubborn at time and refuse to go along with another person’s point of view.  Unless the other person can clearly present his  case with all the supporting evidence, I will not be convinced and won’t go along with his explainations.  I don’t believe in blindly following suit and doing things just because according to you ” It IS the best way to do it” when I feel otherwise.

I’m skeptical and unless you are able to show me how it will bear the results I want, I would want the other person to respect and accept my opinion and way of doing things.

Because of these differences we have we decide that for certain matters  that we will not argue on it but both of us go about it dealing with it using our own methods especially if it is related to the kids.

Showing appreciation for each other is something that we are doing more these few days.  I have found that showing appreciation on a daily basis does help to diffuse any tension that may have been building up through the week.

 These few days I cook more and am experimenting with various different cuisine as I know R does appreciate a  healthy home cooked meal. I’m also actively trying to build up a range of common interests with him so that we have a broader range of topics to talk about which is not kid related.

I guess that it takes time, trial and error to get to know what works and what doesn’t work in a relationship.

How is it between you and your partner?

 

In the next follow up post on LOVE I will be sharing my thoughts  on friendship and kinship. 

 

Post in this series

1)  You and Me Equals US ( An Introduction)

2) You and Me- Where Do We Begin?

3)You and Me- Love (Part One)